Lie and Say This World is Fine
by The Disposable Villain
Summary: Uraraka Ochako knows that something is wrong. She knows that something has been wrong for a very long time. And one day, she realises that she knows exactly what it is. Her mom has been drinking. [ Pre-Canon Childhood AU ]


**Hey, all! For those of you who don't know me, I'm Elliot. This story is pretty auto-biographical but I was happy with it so I wanted to make it a fanfiction too. It's mainly about Ochako growing up and dealing with her parents. Things do get better after the story ends, but yeah. Hope you enjoy!**

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**CW: **Alcoholism, dangerous drinking, marriage issues

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Ochako was six when she walked into the kitchen with the new word on her tongue. She had learned it from _the Simpsons_. Her mom didn't like her watching it on her own. Her dad didn't care. "Dad?"

"Yeah?" Her dad was cutting carrots on the counter for dinner. He didn't look up.

"You're an alcoholic!" Ochako smiled.

The knife hit the counter hard and her dad's shoulders tensed. He hunched over the chopping board.

Ochako frowned. "What's wrong?"

Her dad heaved a shaky sigh.

"Dad, what's wrong?"

"Don't say that again." His voice was too thick, and she ran to hug him around the waist. Her dad didn't turn to return it.

"I'm sorry- I- I thought it meant someone who drinks." Ochako tried to squeeze him. "I'm sorry. I heard it on _the Simpsons_."

Her dad put the knife down. He still wouldn't look at her. "It means someone who can't stop drinking, or take care of their families."

Her breath felt too heavy for her chest. "Like Homer?" Ochako's dad nodded, and the tears slipped out of her eyes. "I'm sorry!" She buried her face in her dad's back. "I didn't mean to- I'm sorry!"

"It's okay." Her dad turned and bent down to hug her. "It's okay; you didn't know." He kissed the top of her head, hard.

Ochako clung to her dad's shirt and sobbed. "I love you- I'm-I-I'm sorry- I lo- I love you-"

"I love you too." Ochako's dad squeezed her. "It's okay - I'm not mad, okay?" His voice sounded a bit lighter.

Ochako looked up. Her dad's face was white, and his eyes were red. "Are you sure?"

He just nodded.

"Okay… I love you."

"I love you too." Her dad smiled. "Now go do your homework, okay? And no more _Simpsons_ when I'm not there."

Ochako didn't even bother to argue. That night, her dad drank a pint of water instead of beer at dinner. Her mom noticed.

"Is something wrong?"

Her dad smiled at her mom. "I'm going to go off drinking for a bit. It'll be good for me."

* * *

"Sh. You'll wake Ochako."

Ochako cracked her eyes open. Light from the open bathroom door shone in her face, and she rolled onto her back to face the wall. It was yellow, and in the dark, she could pretend that it was blue, but she was too scared of the dark to close the door enough to believe it.

Heavy footsteps stumbled by her door. Something fell against the wall.

"Rin, are you okay?"

Her mom and dad were back.

"M'fine."

The footsteps clicked as they staggered down the wooden floor.

"Rin, you should drink some water."

"Don't need it."

"Okay, just- let me help you."

The voices faded, and the door to their room closed. They had promised to give her a hug when they came in. "Mom?" Nothing. "Mom?" Ochako waited. "Mom!" She screamed.

The door opened. Footsteps hurried up the hall. Light flooded from her door and her dad glanced in. "What's wrong?"

Ochako sat up in bed. The blanket bunched around her stomach. "Hug?"

Her dad sighed and walked over to her. He was tall enough that he didn't need to stand on the lower bunk to reach her, and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Get some sleep, pet."

"I want a hug from mom too."

"Your mom's in bed."

"She promised."

Her dad sighed again. "Okay, I'll get her." He left. A cold air nipped at her arms. Ochako sneezed. Why was it so cold? It was meant to be Spring.

Heels clicked up the hall, unsteady. Her mom walked in. Her leggings were gone, but she was still wearing the light pink dress and her boots. One was halfway unzipped. "Sorry, Ocha." She pulled herself up to hug Ochako, and kissed the side of her head. "Thank you for reminding me." Her breath smelled.

Ochako smiled. "You're welcome. Did you have a good time?"

"Yeah." She nuzzled Ochako's cheek with her nose. "Go to sleep. I'll see you in the morning."

Ochako lay down again. Her mom leaned over the railing to kiss her forehead, and Ochako wrinkled her nose at the smell. She wasn't sure what it was, but it was strong. "Night, mom."

"Goodnight, Ocha." She stepped down from the lower bunk and staggered. She held out her arms to steady herself, and then made her way out of the room. "Sleep well."

"You too."

She closed the door, and Ochako heard her walk back down the hall to her room. Once she stepped off the wood and onto carpet, the lack of noise became too obvious. Her tap drip-drip-dripped. Her clock tick-tock-ticked.

When Ochako got up at eight, her dad made breakfast for her.

"Where's mom?" Ochako climbed onto the kitchen chair that she always sat at.

Her dad set a plate in front of her. "She's got the day off, so she's still asleep. She'll be here when you get home from school."

* * *

It got bad a month or two later. Ochako didn't realise it right away. One day, she just realised that she _knew._ Her mom and dad were screaming at each other, and her mom stank of vodka. It was when Ochako got home from school.

Instead of telling them she was back, Ochako hid at the bottom of her closet. She waited until her dad began looking for her, and then she slid a piece of paper beneath the door.

**LEAVE ME ALONE!**

Then she retreated to her closet again. She closed her eyes. It only made things louder.

She heard her dad pick up the paper. Pause. "Rin! Look at this! Look at it!"

Her mom was crying.

Ochako sobbed into her knees, and didn't move until her dad came in and pulled her into his arms.

* * *

It happened again, and again, and again. One night, her dad took her to the Midoriya's apartment, and they spent the evening there. Inko was a homeopath, and liked to give remedies for 'emotional difficulties' as though it would help. Maybe it did. Who knew?

She sat across from her in the wooden-ceilinged living room, feet flat on the ground while Ochako's were curled up under her. The television was on – a documentary on All Might was muted. Izuku had been watching it, but Inko had asked him to give them the sitting room so she could talk to Ochako.

They sat there for an hour, Ochako's eyes and nose red and runny as Inko asked her everything. Where did she get upset? What did she do? Did she get sick?

Finally, Inko closed her book and nodded. "Okay, I've got it. I'll give the remedy to your dad and you can go-"

"I don't want to."

"Why not?" Inko leaned in.

"I'm scared her mom will be drinking again."

When Ochako did eventually get back into the car, her dad drove as slow as he could, and then parked at the entrance to their apartment block for a full minute. It wasn't safe.

"Do you want to go and get a drink?"

Ochako nodded. Anything to avoid going home.

They went to the blue pub under the music store five minutes down the road, and Ochako sat in a booth with her dad's phone while he got a glass of Fanta and one of water. They sat there until the sky turned black, playing some game that involved blowing up lots of robots.

When they finally went home, Ochako was yawning, and her dad's knuckles were white on the wheel. Her mom was passed out on her bed. An empty bottle was beside her head. Ochako threw the bottle away as her dad tucked her mom in, and then Ochako climbed into bed with a book. Her dad said he'd be back in ten minutes.

She didn't look up until the end of the chapter. Half an hour had passed.

Ochako marked her place with a dog ear and climbed out of bed. The door to the guest room was open, and her dad never slept with the door open.

Kitchen. She walked up, and the tile was cold in comparison to carpet.

Empty, and the hallway was dark. A small noise made her turn to the utility room. She could just see a figure sitting at the bottom of the washing machine.

"Dad?"

He looked up as Ochako opened the door fully. He had her red tennis racket - the plastic one that she used in the summer.

It had been torn apart. The top half only hung on by the equivalent of a thread, and her dad pulled it and looked down.

Her breath froze her lungs. "Please don't get a divorce." It was the first thing that burst out of her mouth. Not are you okay, what's wrong, do you need help. No. Please don't get a divorce.

Her dad hit the racket against the ground. "I don't know what else I can do."

* * *

Her mom went to rehab near Osaka for a week, and when she came back, she seemed better. Then the Nights came. They happened a month or two apart. When she relapsed, it was for the Night.

But the Nights had gotten more frequent.

It hadn't happened since her dad had gone to a business meeting in Kyoto looking for any possible funding. He was gone for a week. Ochako and her mom were meant to pick him up from the airport. It was an hour drive, so when it was half an hour before the plane was due to land, Ochako walked into the kitchen. "Mom, we need to go."

Her mom was slumped in the chair. A plastic cup sat in front of her, almost empty. She just hummed.

"Mom, come on!"

Another hum.

Ochako picked up the cup. The liquid looked clear. "Are you okay?"

She nodded, slow and exaggerated. "Yeah, I'm fine- I'm fine."

Ochako frowned. "Are you drunk?"

"No."

"What's in the cup?"

Her mom only hummed again. Ochako repeated the question, again and again. Finally, she shook her head. "Water. It's water."

Ochako took a sip of the liquid and then spat it back into the cup. "No, it's not!"

"It is." Her mom was crying now. "I'm fine."

Ochako put the cup on the table and took her mom's hand. "Come on, _please_! We need to get dad!" She didn't realise just how drunk her mom was - that even if she got behind the wheel and managed to start the car, she probably would only be able to reach the intersection before she crashed.

She couldn't stand, so Ochako just sat on her knees with her head in her mom's lap and cried with her for an hour. Ochako had to bring her to bed, and when she got back to the kitchen, she saw three missed calls from her dad on her mom's phone.

She rang him back.

_"Rin? Where are you?"_

Ochako sniffled. "Hey, dad."

_"Ochako? Hi, where are you? I can't see you."_

"Um…" Ochako rubbed her nose on her sleeve. "We're still at the house and- and mom's asleep and- I'm really sorry, you'll have to get a taxi home. I'm sorry."

_"Hey, it's okay. It's not your fault. Are you okay?"_ His voice was low. He knew. He knew.

"I'm fine." Ochako dragged a hand through her hair. "I just- I'm sorry."

_"It's fine - I'll be home soon."_

* * *

It happened once more.

On her twelfth birthday, Ochako went down to her dad, climbed into the bed, and watched _the Simpsons _with him for an hour. She could see him texting her gran.

**Rin did it again.**

**Oh no**

**Ochako doesn** **'t know yet.**

"Did mom drink again?" Ochako asked. Whispered. If even.

Her dad almost slammed the phone face down on his chest. "No, it's a work thing." The lie came easily. "Rin's a new employee and she left a bunch of cash out on the counter. Nothing happened to it, so we haven't told her mom about it."

Ochako pushed herself up, resting on her elbow. "Don't lie."

"She didn't."

"You promise?"

Her dad just kissed the top of her head. That day, he brought her into work. Ochako didn't argue. She wore her All Might t-shirt – the one her friend gave her. Her dad gave her money, and she walked down the street to get ice-cream and told the person there it was her birthday.

"Do you have any birthday specials?"

She'd meant any special ice-creams, but he probably thought she meant discounts.

"No, sorry."

She ordered a Wonka Delight - it looked the most spectacular, with M&Ms, marshmallows, and crushed up bits of chocolate. She had it gone by the time she wandered halfway back to the construction site. She stopped into the toy shop. Her teacher worked there - the nice foreign one with the Thai accent people made fun of. Everyone called her Bee.

She looked surprised to see Ochako, but she kept up a normal conversation for a few minutes before she asked. "How's your mom doing?"

"She's sick today." Ochako knew it was a lie as she said it. She'd known once her dad told her she couldn't see her mom that morning. But she wanted to believe it – so badly. "It's my birthday!" She was hoping Bee would give her one of the dolls. She'd been admiring them for months – old-style ragdolls with button eyes. It was how Ochako found out Bee worked there.

She didn't. "Happy birthday." She smiled at her, wide across her tiny face with white teeth flashing, and then went back to work, stacking boxes of plastic Barbies onto shelves.

When Ochako bought one of the dolls with the money her dad gave her, she walked back to the site. Her dad saw the doll in her hand as she walked into his office. "Where'd you get that?"

"The toy shop." Ochako hugged it to her chest. "Sensei gave it to me. Her name's Celine."

It was a bad lie. The doll was a thousand yen, the ice-cream was three hundred, and Her dad gave her two thousand. It wasn't questioned.

It was pointless. She didn't even know why she did it.

Maybe she just wanted to show him how it felt.

* * *

Ochako had her birthday the next day, when her mom was better. Her mom showered and wore clean clothes, and set up the sitting room with pink streamers and wrapped presents. Decorating was her mom's _thing_. She could spend days decorating and only spend a thousand yen, but it would look amazing. Not that year. It was rushed, and made something feel off. And Ochako felt sick to her stomach for even thinking it - like she was asking too much.

So Ochako sat in her mom's lap and hugged her as she opened everything.

That night, over pizza and chocolate cake, her mom paused _Mulan_ and said, "I'm going to go back to rehab."

Ochako hugged her and told herself it would work. This time it would work.

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**Hope you enjoyed. Please review, and if you liked this, please check out some of my other stories! Hope to see you next time.**


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